One regular activity that I am so looking forward for during the week is the Fusus Al Hikam class at Paramadina, Pondok Indah, Jakarta on Wednesday nights.
I feel like I always receive something every single time I attend the class. It serves as a weekly reminder for me. A special invitation to go inside myself and to reflect on what is going on within me at that particular moment.
I have been meaning to share with you the stories. But so far I cannot think of a way to share it, in a way that you may see what I see; in a way that I can help you feel and understand what I feel.
Then I thought, why not. Let’s just do it. Share.
Last night we conversed about Moses—the third last chapter of Fusus. It was actually the sixteenth week we conversed about Moses.
This morning a friend asked: so what do you take from last night? (Thank you by the way, for reminding me to write this post).
It is through such abundance of love that He gives. He gives us what we need most at any particular situation, every single time.
Moses is one of His Chosen Ones. God has brought Moses close to Him. When Moses was walking at night in the desert, he was cold. Moses’ body needed warmth. Moses’ soul was looking for the essence of warmth.
God revealed Himself as what Moses needed most at that time: fire. To warm Moses’ body and allow his soul to feel the warmth that he was yearning for. He becomes what he desire and the essence of desire.
God gives us what we need. In Moses case, what he needed was what also what he wanted, as he is always aligned with God’s Will. For us, what we need may not necessarily what want, and vice verca.
Yet God still gives. He does not give up on us. We just don’t realize it. We just don’t know. That’s when faith comes in.
We pray with certitude that God is listening (the question is do we listen?). We pray with certitude that He is the Best Arranger. We pray with certitude of God’s compassion.
I am talking about the kind of prayer that is more than just what we utter with our lips. Every single cell can utter the prayer. Every thought, every feeling, every action is a prayer, a request. Hence, prayer is a way of being: let’s live with certitude of His Compassion.
If and when we truly believe this with all our heart, when the longing in our soul for Him is so strong, our soul, our desire (towards Him) will move us. We shall seek and, God willing, He will guide us.
I remember another conversation on Christmas Day 2008 at Chisholme, Beshara. A friend asked: what do you want for Christmas? He then rephrased it: What do you want for Christmas, knowing for certain you are going to get it?
That left us—at that time—with some questions: How certain are we of God’s generosity? When we ask, how certain are we that He listens and responds? Are we really listening to the response?
I shall end this note with the quote from Sayyid Husayn Nasr: “At every moment of the day, we have the choice of either forgetting God and remembering Him.”
We have this option, every single second of our life.