That we keep kidding ourselves

There was something I have just noticed about myself. I seem to have a(n even) lower treshold for small talks. Perhaps small talks is not the correct term.

What I mean is that I am not inclined to be in a conversation where we do not talk about what matters – to each of us at the moment.

We can get together and talk about anything – if that’s what is in your mind or what is going on with you or me. We can talk about nothing and everything – if nothing and everything is what is in your mind.

But if there is an elephant in the room, and for some reason we choose to talk about everything but the elephant, then let’s do this some other day, when we are more ready and willing.

The thing is, I want to see more of you, and more of me. We are that precious.

It would feel like a waste of our precious time, whenever we are not being honest – to ourselves and about ourselves. It is selfish for us not to allow our soul to honestly express itself and to hide our gift to the world.

Expression – be it verbal or otherwise – is what we are. A friend once asked, “What is the worst thing that can happen, if we continue to act as if we are happy when we are sad?”

“That we would keep kidding ourselves,” said I, astounded by my own response.

Kidding ourselves is hard work. It comes with an army of protections and vulnerabilities. It comes with heaviness and if-onlys. These words come from own experience.

So I offered myself a new way of being, which I’d like to extend to you now: Let’s try honesty. Let’s look each other in the eyes and be Real.


PS: Have you read The Invitation, by Oriah?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s