Pertanyaan ulang tahun: Nia

Pada ulang tahun saya beberapa waktu lalu, saya meminta tiga orang teman mengajukan tiga pertanyaan. Pertanyaan dibebaskan apa saja yang muncul dalam benak mereka. Tiga teman yang kebetulan semua berkecimpung di @writingtable, yaitu Hanny, Nia, dan Windy (berdasarkan urutan abjad).

Ada pertanyaan yang diajukan dalam Bahasa Inggris, ada yang dalam Bahasa Indonesia. Akan saya tanggapi sesuai bahasa pertanyaan. Semoga nantinya diberi waktu untuk menuliskan terjemahannya.

Pertanyaan dari Nia akan saya jawab pertama. Sekadar karena tanggapan untuk pertanyaan-pertanyaan ini terasa mengalir terlebih dahulu. Pertanyaan Windy saya jawab pada posting berikutnya. Pertanyaan Hanny masih berproses.

Untuk Nia, tiga (pertanyaan) menjadi lima. Beklah.

Pertanyaan Nia

1. How would you like to be remembered when you are dead?

I want you – yes, you – to remember me as a someone who loves to have you as a friend. Generally speaking, I am happy for people to remember me in whichever way they do. That is, I want people to simply remember me with the honest impression I have left on them.

In fact, I am quite happy even if they do not remember me. Because that is not what matters most. It is not that important whether they remember me. There are more important things that we need to remember. To remember Kindness. Happiness. Generosity. Peace. Joy. Being human. And if you like, God. Those are ‘things’ – if I ever have a say at all – that I want people to remember.

Having said that, if I have ever invoked that feelings in them (you) – if I have ever made them (you) feel love(d), kindness, generosity, peace, joy – then please remember me that way. Please use these memories as a mean for you to stay in touch with the love, kindess, that you are. That you already have in you.

2. Can we really ever teach compassion?

*googling the word “teach”*
I had googled the word ‘teach’ before I wrote the response for this question. I could not find the definition that was in line with what I had in mind. My definition of teach is more of education, which stems from latin “educare” – meaning to draw out, to raise up.

In this sense, educating people about compassion implies drawing out the compassion that is of their true nature. This is done by expressing the compassion that we already are ourselves and sharing it with the people or the universes. So much so that they start recognising the compassion in themselves, mirror that compassion and express it in a way that is unique to them.

We do it by example; by giving the experience of compassion; by us being that expression of compassion ourselves. Again, we need to bear in mind, how we express compassion varies. Everyone has their own particular colors. We need to respect and even celebrate that, too.

If we see it this way, I can say with confidence, yes, we can.

3. If Miauw could talk, what do you think your morning coffee/tea talk, would be about?

First off, mid morning is her snooze time – so chances are there will be no talking happening at those hours.

For the sake of responding to the question, however, let’s assume she is awake. Perhaps a bit moody from the lack of sleep. There won’t be much difference. I imagine she will say she wants food. She wants me to open the door to the front porch for her sunbathing regime. She’ll say hello. Occasionally, she will say to me “What’s the rush? For heaven’s sake, chill” (with thick British accent).

Mostly, I presume, we will just be sitting or lounging howeer and wherever we feel like it. Sometimes next to each other, other times with some space between us. We’re comfortable enough to be with each other in silence and still feels the closeness. One will be busy with her gadget, while the other will be busy grooming herself. I shall let you guess which is which.

4. Do horses sweat?

Yes. And pigs fly. Cats rule. Dogs drool.

5. If I were to switch profession to an escort girl, will you still be my friend?

Yes. In a heart beat. Will you?

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