The wall of pride. How we have slowly built it brick by brick over the years. Out of fear. To protect our seemingly delicate heart. A process so discreet that sometimes even we ourselves don’t realise. That is, until we encounter our strong mirror(s). Someone we so desperately want to reach out to and hold. But we are unable to – as the walls remain strong between us.
Some people probably have noticed I have grown quieter – if it is at all possible. Apparently it is. I have noticed it, too. I have noticed a lot of things in me of late. I noticed I have become more selective in the activities (and people) I prefer to stay engage with.
There are things that do not appeal to me, and things that do. I engage with things that appeal to me, and stay away from those that do not, in a matter-of-fact manner. And they changes over time. Hence not-so-interesting things can sometimes turn to be rather interesting, or the other way around. One is allowed to have a change of heart.
Then I realise, ‘selective’ may not be the appropriate term, for the word implies deliberate act of selection. Mine is not so much a process of selection (through thought-process). Rather, it is a tendency of the heart. Continue reading →
Spirituality. We can make it as complicated as we can possibly imagine – for it has its intricacies – or we can stay as simple as we wish to be. Even light and playful.
It is about living from the core. It is about being honest in expressing ourselves. It is about becoming who we are in our original potential. It is about being moved by something Greater – I call It God, Allah. You may call It by any other names you wish, or not, or even not at all.
“It’s been too long,” said the ocean with its usual majestic voice, as I dipped myself by its shore. Its waves warmly enveloped my feet, up to the knees. Washing over my entire being with gladness and relief. Reminding me of what I have been missing. And what has been missing me.
“I apologise. I offer no excuses, for there is none. But I am here now. That’s what matters. So, let’s converse. Let’s pick up where we have left off,” I responded, startled by the immediate engagement to converse. Continue reading →
“Mencintalah sedemikian hingga yang kaucinta merasa (ter)bebas(kan).” Demikian ujar Thich Nhat Hanh. Sebuah sapaan yang terus lekat di hati. Aku dapat merasakan kebenaran yang ia kandung. Aku pun dapat merasakan lengketnya kalimat itu setiap ia melintas dalam kesadaranku. Sebuah pekerjaan rumah yang belum tuntas dalam sekolah kehidupanku. Continue reading →